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Debra Roberts

Home, Family and Distance

Our family and our nest are vital for good health and wellbeing. As women, we need to stay connected to our families as best we are able. We are wired to do so and we need to. And we need a comfy nest.


Modern times plus travel or employment opportunities mean that for many women, families are dispersed across the globe. This separates mothers from grown up children and grandchildren, and also siblings from each other. Oftentimes, with our families at different stages of life, whether with young families, career focused, or as older women, we often need to manage without the assistance from our extended families, due to distance. Some of us live alone by choice or circumstance, and may not have easy access to family members. Some of us are in blended families, which can bring other joys and challenges.


As women, we are fortunate to have access to technology these days. Studies show that keeping in close contact with family benefits our health, (assuming healthy family relationships). So even if we live in different towns, states, or countries, we can choose to use email, telephone, Skype calls, or write letters the “old fashioned” way to keep in touch.


I raised my children overseas for eight years of their young lives, without my parents, brothers, grandparents, aunties or uncles to assist me. My third child was born in Scotland. After returning to Australia, I then I lived in a different state from my parents, brothers, aunties and uncles, nieces and nephews and grandparents. So for me, I had to rely on friends to be my surrogate family in good times and challenging times for most of my adult life. This is what we can choose to do to bridge the gap. Now that I live in Australia again, I see my closest family who live interstate usually two or three times a year. When living overseas, phone calls, emails and letters can be used regularly, or we use Skype, Zoom or What’s App so we can see each other as we chat online!

What about our home? Our home needs to be somewhere that reflects who we are, and our values. It needs to be a place of safety and sanctuary. It needs to provide shelter, warmth and a place to rejuvenate our energy supplies ready for a new day. It needs to be a place we can be ourselves, create, grow and just be.


Your Next Steps:

1. Do you need to make a plan to be better in touch with your family members?

2. How often would you like to chat or see them?

3. Do you need to ask forgiveness and forgive others in order to repair lost or broken relationships?

4. Make a plan today. Jot down one or two things you will do as the next step. Do it for your own health and well-being.

5. What is one thing you could do to make your home more of a sanctuary for you? Make a plan. Ask me for help if needed. Make a start.


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